My mommy group did this cute little game where we would post 25 random facts about ourselves... I didn't participate.
I couldn't think of anything other than "I like old Mac & Cheese" which I thought was a little lame in comparison.
I've spentabout a month a little bit of time thinking and racking my brain and I think I've come up with 10 things.
They're still lame but I think it's time you got to know me... well, more so than you do, I guess.
Okay, shut up, never mind.
1. I hate fresh macaroni and cheese and I hate when it's watery. I make a huge batch and then put it in the refrigerator for the next day. I love when it's all sticky and it makes that nasty gooey sound when you stir it. I feel like a gourmet chef when I dump in a can of peas or mixed vegetables.
2. I havehorrible mild road rage... Even when I'm not the one driving. I am nowhere near as bad as I was ten years ago but it's still not pretty. I'm not the kind that honk my horn or cut people off but I yell a lot. It makes me feel better. My dad said that he feels sorry for how angry I am but I explained that I'm not angry. I just rant and get it out and then it's just a funny story of some a-hole I almost got hit by. I say mean stuff but it's all just talk. Besides, my dad is the one who taught me my crazy road rage. He's worse than me, don't let him fool you. (Sorry I had to rat you out, Dad) I do, however, feel bad for any body if they end up hitting me. You better have good insurance or you might be better off running. Especially if my kids are with me. It won't be pretty.
3. I tend to have a rather immature sense of humor. I like stupid pranks like from Jackass and phrases like "Fire butt blasters" makes me laugh until I pee... and then I laugh some more because I just wet myself. I like mixing leftover food items when we're at a restaurant. It's a bad habit my sister taught me and one my younger step-girl has picked up. I make poo jokes and think fart noises are hysterical. I always have to censor myself from writing about my latest stinky fart bomb or uber gross snot blow. I'm gross. I am constantly telling my husband things he probably had no desire to know. It's his fault; he doesn't tell me to stop.
4. I've lied twice to my husband in the past 5 years. I lied to him about his birthday present when I was really planning his surprise party and I lied to him about... hmmmm... I guess it was only once. I can't lie to him. There's something about him that makes the truth come pouring out of my mouth. I tell him things I've never told anyone else and I tell him him things that I had no intention of telling him. I have to. There is no hiding anything from him. Don't think for a second that I've ever hidden anything or not shared a single thing with him. I've never had such a starkly honest relationship with someone and at times it's intimidating but so special to me. If you don't want him to know, don't tell me.
5. I catch myself constantly wondering why my husband chose me. I've already talked about how I've put him on a pedestal and live in absolute adoration of him. He's losing weight now. I've always been hot for him but now he is just hunky-licious (That had nothing to do with this fact, but I had to share). If I can't figure out why he loves me, how can I keep him?
6. I do not have an accent. I have an insanely useless and bad habit of picking up other's peoples accents. I can mock just about any body's accent during a conversation with them. I don't know why I do it, I don't know why it started and no, I can't stop it. Occasionally, when I get flustered or mad, I pick up a Midwest accent. I don't know where that comes from either. I've been in Vegas for about 25 years. I am a Vegas girl and I do not have an accent. Sorry.
7. I love playing with Barbies. I had a Barbie dollhouse in my room until I was 16. Not your average dollhouse either. My mom made me an 8 room palace, so I couldn't give it up until I was absolutely sure I was ready to move on. It was about 9 feet across and 5 feet high. It was my heaven. I still have the last cubby in our playroom and I smile every time I think of what it represents. I tried sharing my love of Barbies with my step-girl but when I started setting everything up, I got a little territorial and she didn't want to play with me anymore. It's not my fault! She tried to put the milk on the second shelf of the fridge and not the door. Duh, everybody knows the milk goes in the door...
8. I am a forgiving person. Maybe too forgiving if there is such a thing. I may need some time to vent or air it out but once I've cooled off from whatever has angered me, I'm typically over it. I don't forget, there is a difference, but I can forgive. I find life to be easier when you just forgive and move on. I love talking things out and trying to work out a solution but if the other person isn't a big fan of that, I can accept that and done. So, if you think that you've angered me (or even if I've angered you), just talk to me.
Let's do lunch and hug it out.
9. I love my mother but our relationship is... hard. We are two very similar people and don't share only the best of our personalities (*cough* stubborness). I am trying to find who I am as an adult and as a person but I also have to recognize who my mom is as a person and not just as my mother. I still tend to see her as the mom who won't let me go to the dance and she can still see me as the naughty child sneaking sodas to my room and lying about it. I know I blame her for far more than is actually her fault. I could probably create a game similar to "6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon" and call it "6 Degrees of Blaming My Mom."
I'm working on accepting my faults and also hers. We're walking a very delicate balance with each other but hopefully we'll be able to grow and have the amazing relationship we've both always wanted with each other.
10. Nothing I ever think in my head every comes out on paper or is said the way I thought it. I tend to jumble things and get ahead of myself and say something far more obtuse than what I meant. Which is a shame because my thoughts are frickin genius!
11. I tend to feel like I am an inconvenience to most people. I feel like I should be seen and never heard. Maybe not even seen. I feel like I never do a good job, which is why I never finish all my home projects. I over criticize myself to the point of giving up. I feel that people don't actually want to be friends with me and that if I call them to talk to or ask to hang out, they are trying to get out of it. I feel like if I do go some place with people, I have to repay their favor and do whatever it takes to make us "even". All this low self-worth is odd to me though because I have amazingly high self-esteem. I love how I look, I love my body. I know what my faults are but I am not stuck on them. I'm overweight, so what? I have large hips and big boobs. Gotta have a little pudge to support them or risk folding in half.
12. I hate my effing teeth. I have hated them ever since my tooth fell out when I was 9 and I was stuck with my gap tooth smile. I wish that I had gone to the dentist more often as a child and been allowed braces. Since I went so long in between, I am now terrified of going. Massive panic attacks with shakes and sweating and painful cramps ensue. I start to have trouble breathing and I literally run out when I am done. I am currently trying to find a dentist willing to knock me out and do all my fillings so I can just get it all done with one visit... Oh and I have to have my wisdom teeth taken out... My consult is Friday. I already have a stress headache.
13. I have no tact. I am learning how to say things nicely but it's hard when I don't understand why I have to say, "Those pants look tight" vs "You put on some weight, didn't you?"
I am not a fan of niceties. They're false and tend to edge into my "No Lie" zone. If I need to call someone and ask to borrow their car, why do I need to start with "How's your day? (that's nice, I don't really care)" and "How'd that sprain work out? (don't care, I have things I'm trying to plan)" or "The weather is getting really hot (it's Vegas, it's always hot)"
14. When I met my husband and realized I loved him and how messed up my previous relationship was, I decided no more lying. Which is a shame since I was really, really good at it. I mean, really good at it. I feel that the truth is safer and sometimes way better than a lie. That doesn't mean that when I was renting weekly apartments I didn't fluff up my spiel a bit. All good sales people do. I'm sorry but that purse is hideous and if I still had a cat, he would vomit in it to prove it. But if you want me to tell you it's pretty and that's what gets you in the buying mood.. well then it's gorgeous and I have to have one.
15. I am in love with my hair. It's long and healthy for the first time in... well... hmmm... Ever. I haven't dyed it in 5 years and as much as I would like to, I don't think I will for a very long time. I am obsessive about it. I don't brush it eighty times a day but I have hand picked two women to be my hair dressers since I trust no one else to cut it as I want it cut. I can be rather vain about it. I don't show it by flipping it everywhere but I'm thinking it.
16. I am not computer savy. The handful of knowledge I have is how to upload pictures because I need to be able to do that. I once made a computer start smoking before I even turned it on. My IT department hates me and I always get that big *sigh* when I call. I think they've blocked my extension from calling and their message is now "You've called IT, if you are a normal person who doesn't scare the office equipment into breaking, press #1... If you are Bri, hang up and buy a new one"
The other small bits I know are from dealing with drama and how to properly protect myself from stalkers. I am a myspace pro. Actually, I used to be. No one uses myspace anymore (except pedios and musicians (who can be pedios)) so I'm not as proficient as I used to be. I am pretty knowledgeable about FaceBook (yay, another life long dream accomplished) so if you have issues, message me, I'll help protect you.
17. Do not ask me a question that you do not really want to know the answer to. I am an open book and while I will not run around telling people things better left unsaid, you'll open that can of worms if you ask the right question. Don't ask if the "magic" is still in our sex life... cause I'll tell you. Don't ask if that dress looks cute... cause I'll tell you. Don't ask about my stomach cramps... cause I'll tell you. Don't ask if I like you and why not... cause I'll tell you.
18. My family is my everything. They are my world and my life. Don't mess with them and don't hurt them or I will hurt you. Period. And that includes the ones I don't get along with (and the ones who don't like me). They're family (even if they won't accept that) and so I will be there for them if they ever needed anything.
19. I joke about everything. I laugh about it all. There is no "untouchable" subject for me. I know how to be serious but one of my "good friend features" is my humor and ability to make my friends laugh when they need it most. I joke about my miscarriage, my cat's death, my ex, my kids, my abuse, about being a supposed gold-digger (I'm giggling even now) and anything else. If you call me a name, I'm going to laugh it off. If you threaten me, I will joke about it. That's how I deal with my pain or just deal in general. Some people cry or attack others. I'm not a pretty crier, so laughter it is.
I'm also an optimist. I can twist most situations and find the sunshine on a rainy day. That's part of my ability to laugh.
20. Yeah, I just text my sister to ask her what I should add here.
No really, my text actually says " I'm writing 25 facts about me. Anything I need to know about myself?"
And then I asked my love, too.... These last couple are their suggestions
21. I hate tomatoes but I like marinara sauce. That makes me weird, I guess? I used to say I was allergic to onions when I was younger, but than I actually became allergic to them and people thought I was still lying about it. I really am allergic. Pregnancy screws everything up. It made me allergic to fish, too. I used to eat shrimp by the fistful and now I can't even smell it. I have weird issues about food. My meat has to be burned beyond recognition and it's usually safer if I don't know what's in my food. I've been reading on Adult Picky Eating as an eating disorder and it sounds just like me. Bland, basic foods are my diet and I could eat it almost every single day.
22. I am passionate about photography. I love taking thousands of pictures and I tend to take a couple of really good ones. That being said, I don't want to become a professional photographer. I don't want that burden put on me to produce my art on command to make a living. I want to have my studio and photograph what I want, when I want. My dream is to be able to find beautiful (my version of beautiful) people and ask them to shoot at my studio. I want to be able to shoot my friend's key life moments and milestones. I want a clawfoot bathtub and a huge high back chair or settee wrapped in velvet... *oh drool!*
I worked at a portrait studio (walmart's but still a studio) and I learned some key pointers but it was hell always finding the right pose and listening to the customer's complain about how it didn't turn out right.
You're ugly, that's why it turned out ugly... Accept it and pay me my money!
23. I am amazingly accurate on predicting flat tires. I am one with the tire and can always sense when they are going to go flat. It's a talent I was born with and no you can't learn it.
24. When I am in a deep sleep, my throat clicks when I breathe. This was my love's fact for me. I told him the world didn't need to know I snore but he argued that I didn't snore (or at least not always) but it's more of a clicking. Uh, thanks, that's much better... I'm a throat clicker, yay.
25. I am awesome at Tetris! I am unbeatable and unstoppable. I played in our computer class (hence why I am horrible with computers) and I am a 10-key master and a Tetris god. I challenge you. I will beat you and you will lose.
My love wants me to tell you all that I am a closet sci-fi geek but I'm not. I'm not going to tell you that I love Star Wars and Lord of the Rings or that I watched every episode of Battlestar Gallactica. He's crazy and I refuse to tell that...
I couldn't think of anything other than "I like old Mac & Cheese" which I thought was a little lame in comparison.
I've spent
They're still lame but I think it's time you got to know me... well, more so than you do, I guess.
Okay, shut up, never mind.
1. I hate fresh macaroni and cheese and I hate when it's watery. I make a huge batch and then put it in the refrigerator for the next day. I love when it's all sticky and it makes that nasty gooey sound when you stir it. I feel like a gourmet chef when I dump in a can of peas or mixed vegetables.
2. I have
3. I tend to have a rather immature sense of humor. I like stupid pranks like from Jackass and phrases like "Fire butt blasters" makes me laugh until I pee... and then I laugh some more because I just wet myself. I like mixing leftover food items when we're at a restaurant. It's a bad habit my sister taught me and one my younger step-girl has picked up. I make poo jokes and think fart noises are hysterical. I always have to censor myself from writing about my latest stinky fart bomb or uber gross snot blow. I'm gross. I am constantly telling my husband things he probably had no desire to know. It's his fault; he doesn't tell me to stop.
4. I've lied twice to my husband in the past 5 years. I lied to him about his birthday present when I was really planning his surprise party and I lied to him about... hmmmm... I guess it was only once. I can't lie to him. There's something about him that makes the truth come pouring out of my mouth. I tell him things I've never told anyone else and I tell him him things that I had no intention of telling him. I have to. There is no hiding anything from him. Don't think for a second that I've ever hidden anything or not shared a single thing with him. I've never had such a starkly honest relationship with someone and at times it's intimidating but so special to me. If you don't want him to know, don't tell me.
5. I catch myself constantly wondering why my husband chose me. I've already talked about how I've put him on a pedestal and live in absolute adoration of him. He's losing weight now. I've always been hot for him but now he is just hunky-licious (That had nothing to do with this fact, but I had to share). If I can't figure out why he loves me, how can I keep him?
6. I do not have an accent. I have an insanely useless and bad habit of picking up other's peoples accents. I can mock just about any body's accent during a conversation with them. I don't know why I do it, I don't know why it started and no, I can't stop it. Occasionally, when I get flustered or mad, I pick up a Midwest accent. I don't know where that comes from either. I've been in Vegas for about 25 years. I am a Vegas girl and I do not have an accent. Sorry.
7. I love playing with Barbies. I had a Barbie dollhouse in my room until I was 16. Not your average dollhouse either. My mom made me an 8 room palace, so I couldn't give it up until I was absolutely sure I was ready to move on. It was about 9 feet across and 5 feet high. It was my heaven. I still have the last cubby in our playroom and I smile every time I think of what it represents. I tried sharing my love of Barbies with my step-girl but when I started setting everything up, I got a little territorial and she didn't want to play with me anymore. It's not my fault! She tried to put the milk on the second shelf of the fridge and not the door. Duh, everybody knows the milk goes in the door...
8. I am a forgiving person. Maybe too forgiving if there is such a thing. I may need some time to vent or air it out but once I've cooled off from whatever has angered me, I'm typically over it. I don't forget, there is a difference, but I can forgive. I find life to be easier when you just forgive and move on. I love talking things out and trying to work out a solution but if the other person isn't a big fan of that, I can accept that and done. So, if you think that you've angered me (or even if I've angered you), just talk to me.
Let's do lunch and hug it out.
9. I love my mother but our relationship is... hard. We are two very similar people and don't share only the best of our personalities (*cough* stubborness). I am trying to find who I am as an adult and as a person but I also have to recognize who my mom is as a person and not just as my mother. I still tend to see her as the mom who won't let me go to the dance and she can still see me as the naughty child sneaking sodas to my room and lying about it. I know I blame her for far more than is actually her fault. I could probably create a game similar to "6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon" and call it "6 Degrees of Blaming My Mom."
I'm working on accepting my faults and also hers. We're walking a very delicate balance with each other but hopefully we'll be able to grow and have the amazing relationship we've both always wanted with each other.
10. Nothing I ever think in my head every comes out on paper or is said the way I thought it. I tend to jumble things and get ahead of myself and say something far more obtuse than what I meant. Which is a shame because my thoughts are frickin genius!
11. I tend to feel like I am an inconvenience to most people. I feel like I should be seen and never heard. Maybe not even seen. I feel like I never do a good job, which is why I never finish all my home projects. I over criticize myself to the point of giving up. I feel that people don't actually want to be friends with me and that if I call them to talk to or ask to hang out, they are trying to get out of it. I feel like if I do go some place with people, I have to repay their favor and do whatever it takes to make us "even". All this low self-worth is odd to me though because I have amazingly high self-esteem. I love how I look, I love my body. I know what my faults are but I am not stuck on them. I'm overweight, so what? I have large hips and big boobs. Gotta have a little pudge to support them or risk folding in half.
12. I hate my effing teeth. I have hated them ever since my tooth fell out when I was 9 and I was stuck with my gap tooth smile. I wish that I had gone to the dentist more often as a child and been allowed braces. Since I went so long in between, I am now terrified of going. Massive panic attacks with shakes and sweating and painful cramps ensue. I start to have trouble breathing and I literally run out when I am done. I am currently trying to find a dentist willing to knock me out and do all my fillings so I can just get it all done with one visit... Oh and I have to have my wisdom teeth taken out... My consult is Friday. I already have a stress headache.
13. I have no tact. I am learning how to say things nicely but it's hard when I don't understand why I have to say, "Those pants look tight" vs "You put on some weight, didn't you?"
I am not a fan of niceties. They're false and tend to edge into my "No Lie" zone. If I need to call someone and ask to borrow their car, why do I need to start with "How's your day? (that's nice, I don't really care)" and "How'd that sprain work out? (don't care, I have things I'm trying to plan)" or "The weather is getting really hot (it's Vegas, it's always hot)"
14. When I met my husband and realized I loved him and how messed up my previous relationship was, I decided no more lying. Which is a shame since I was really, really good at it. I mean, really good at it. I feel that the truth is safer and sometimes way better than a lie. That doesn't mean that when I was renting weekly apartments I didn't fluff up my spiel a bit. All good sales people do. I'm sorry but that purse is hideous and if I still had a cat, he would vomit in it to prove it. But if you want me to tell you it's pretty and that's what gets you in the buying mood.. well then it's gorgeous and I have to have one.
15. I am in love with my hair. It's long and healthy for the first time in... well... hmmm... Ever. I haven't dyed it in 5 years and as much as I would like to, I don't think I will for a very long time. I am obsessive about it. I don't brush it eighty times a day but I have hand picked two women to be my hair dressers since I trust no one else to cut it as I want it cut. I can be rather vain about it. I don't show it by flipping it everywhere but I'm thinking it.
16. I am not computer savy. The handful of knowledge I have is how to upload pictures because I need to be able to do that. I once made a computer start smoking before I even turned it on. My IT department hates me and I always get that big *sigh* when I call. I think they've blocked my extension from calling and their message is now "You've called IT, if you are a normal person who doesn't scare the office equipment into breaking, press #1... If you are Bri, hang up and buy a new one"
The other small bits I know are from dealing with drama and how to properly protect myself from stalkers. I am a myspace pro. Actually, I used to be. No one uses myspace anymore (except pedios and musicians (who can be pedios)) so I'm not as proficient as I used to be. I am pretty knowledgeable about FaceBook (yay, another life long dream accomplished) so if you have issues, message me, I'll help protect you.
17. Do not ask me a question that you do not really want to know the answer to. I am an open book and while I will not run around telling people things better left unsaid, you'll open that can of worms if you ask the right question. Don't ask if the "magic" is still in our sex life... cause I'll tell you. Don't ask if that dress looks cute... cause I'll tell you. Don't ask about my stomach cramps... cause I'll tell you. Don't ask if I like you and why not... cause I'll tell you.
18. My family is my everything. They are my world and my life. Don't mess with them and don't hurt them or I will hurt you. Period. And that includes the ones I don't get along with (and the ones who don't like me). They're family (even if they won't accept that) and so I will be there for them if they ever needed anything.
19. I joke about everything. I laugh about it all. There is no "untouchable" subject for me. I know how to be serious but one of my "good friend features" is my humor and ability to make my friends laugh when they need it most. I joke about my miscarriage, my cat's death, my ex, my kids, my abuse, about being a supposed gold-digger (I'm giggling even now) and anything else. If you call me a name, I'm going to laugh it off. If you threaten me, I will joke about it. That's how I deal with my pain or just deal in general. Some people cry or attack others. I'm not a pretty crier, so laughter it is.
I'm also an optimist. I can twist most situations and find the sunshine on a rainy day. That's part of my ability to laugh.
20. Yeah, I just text my sister to ask her what I should add here.
No really, my text actually says " I'm writing 25 facts about me. Anything I need to know about myself?"
And then I asked my love, too.... These last couple are their suggestions
21. I hate tomatoes but I like marinara sauce. That makes me weird, I guess? I used to say I was allergic to onions when I was younger, but than I actually became allergic to them and people thought I was still lying about it. I really am allergic. Pregnancy screws everything up. It made me allergic to fish, too. I used to eat shrimp by the fistful and now I can't even smell it. I have weird issues about food. My meat has to be burned beyond recognition and it's usually safer if I don't know what's in my food. I've been reading on Adult Picky Eating as an eating disorder and it sounds just like me. Bland, basic foods are my diet and I could eat it almost every single day.
22. I am passionate about photography. I love taking thousands of pictures and I tend to take a couple of really good ones. That being said, I don't want to become a professional photographer. I don't want that burden put on me to produce my art on command to make a living. I want to have my studio and photograph what I want, when I want. My dream is to be able to find beautiful (my version of beautiful) people and ask them to shoot at my studio. I want to be able to shoot my friend's key life moments and milestones. I want a clawfoot bathtub and a huge high back chair or settee wrapped in velvet... *oh drool!*
I worked at a portrait studio (walmart's but still a studio) and I learned some key pointers but it was hell always finding the right pose and listening to the customer's complain about how it didn't turn out right.
You're ugly, that's why it turned out ugly... Accept it and pay me my money!
23. I am amazingly accurate on predicting flat tires. I am one with the tire and can always sense when they are going to go flat. It's a talent I was born with and no you can't learn it.
24. When I am in a deep sleep, my throat clicks when I breathe. This was my love's fact for me. I told him the world didn't need to know I snore but he argued that I didn't snore (or at least not always) but it's more of a clicking. Uh, thanks, that's much better... I'm a throat clicker, yay.
25. I am awesome at Tetris! I am unbeatable and unstoppable. I played in our computer class (hence why I am horrible with computers) and I am a 10-key master and a Tetris god. I challenge you. I will beat you and you will lose.
My love wants me to tell you all that I am a closet sci-fi geek but I'm not. I'm not going to tell you that I love Star Wars and Lord of the Rings or that I watched every episode of Battlestar Gallactica. He's crazy and I refuse to tell that...
