How's My Week?!?!?

How's my week?!?!?!

Oh, you mean my week from H-E-Double Hockey?

Let's see, where do I begin?

My birthday was Sunday and my present first thing that morning was my husband leaving me for a week.

I get to go to work feeling sick and with low sugar. On the verge of fainting or vomiting all day.

I was reminded that while I thoroughly enjoy my job, there are some VERY hard days. Talk about an emotional train wreck, so I had to add "trying not to cry" to my list of things not to do...

Monday I take my step-girl home. Not bad in itself, except I couldn't find my frickin CDs to listen to in the car and I really need a good vibe to pick me up from the funk of missing my love.

I am at the end of the 45 minute drive to her house when, Oops, she remembers she forgot her study books at our house and needs them that night. I get to drive 45 minutes back to my house, to drive 45 minutes back to her house, to drive 45 minutes back home... I really hated my car at the end of that day... Especially since I had no CDs!!! I can only listen to Rihanna choke on her lies and Usher "OMG" so many times...
Then my sister goes to hospital for pain issues... So I got to worry about her... She's still in pain but doctors here are dumb and just said her hip pain was related to a migraine. Let me know when you get how that works, k?

 To finalize that day, I got to fight Chunko for my dinner (something I would get to repeat every night this week).

Tuesday Geekers got a fever and I had to worry about whether it was high enough to leave work early and get him and wonder if I should call out for the next day to take care of him... He ended up just having a low grade fever, so all that worry for nothing.

Wednesday, Chunko fell out of bed in the middle of the night... Or does that count as Thursday? Anyways, I got to panic that he broke his arm or that he had brain damage (he's fine, too) on top of little sleep...

Throughout this week of everything going wrong, Chunko has been fussy and about to crack his next tooth. Or that's what I keep telling myself so I don't scream everytime he does. He really misses his Daddy and has been needy, whiny and mean in his sadness. He doesn't want to eat his dinner, only mine and my evenings are spent carrying him and fighting him for my dinner plate.

My anxiety has peaked and I am ready to snap... Which means I get to have the messed up dreams that make me freak out even more... And they typically surround the one relationship I can't fix... $500 to the first correct guess!

No way, that's too easy!

I dreamed that I won a LAMB purse with Gwen tickets and my first thought was to use it as bribe to get my OSD to talk to me. I think she hates me so much that even that wouldn't work...

I talked with a co-worker who told me that she unfairly hated her step-mother. She thought that she was a gold-digger and that she was trying to ruin the family (familiar, right?) and that it took her almost 15 years and their divorce for her to realize how wrong she had been. So of course, I dream of that...

How amazing would it be if she were to call out of the blue and try? For my love I would give up all my anger if it meant they could talk and be ok again... I would give almost anything for that...

That's the only ones I remember, can't seem to block them like the rest no matter how bad I want to. I'm getting better, but when my anxiety freaks out it's hard to not add on this stress... It's like a "why not cluster f**K"

I want to call Gary Spivey and ask him if there's any hope but I haven't yet... Maybe it's because I don't want to hear that the answer is a firm "No!!"

My love returns tomorrow and it is not soon enough cause I am tired of being a stress ball... I don't handle it well... I tend to eat my emotions and so I choose to keep telling myself:

Wonder what tonight will bring me?